Nisha's Sacred Sexology G~Spot: Love and sacred sexual union part 2

Nisha's Sacred Sexology G~Spot: Love and sacred sexual union part 2

Love and sacred sexual union part 2

Part 2 of our journey into the realm of LOVE.

We left off discussing Robert Sternberg's Theory of the 3 stages of love. (if you are reading this blog first your more than welcome to go to the list and read part 1)

Now we are going to see what the 6 styles of love are which were created by psychologist John Allen Lee.  Dr. Lee's theory is taken from ancient Greek words that provide character to intimate human relations:

1. Individuals with romantic love style known as (eros) place their emphasis on physical beauty and search for ideal mates. These are the romantic, erotic lovers who delight in physical beauty, tactile and sensual pleasures provided to them by their lovers' bodies, they tend to be very affectionate and openly communicative with their partners. Think lots of PDA (public displays of affection). This style may also include life styles such as; swinging, swapping, poly and open relationships. This love style is the most superficial but can be fun.

2. Individuals with game-playing style (ludus) like to play the field and engage in many sexual "conquests" with little to no commitment. Love is for them fun, exciting, it's the act of the seduction that turns them on and keeps them motivated. These relationships are transitory and remain casual. Here is where the beginning stages are often engaged in. Flirting, eye roaming, open gestures ensue. These individuals are difficult to pin down and always seem to have a busy schedule and "loads" of friends of the opposite sex.

3. Individuals with a possessive love style (mania) tend to gravitate toward obsession which are often laden with jealousy and turmoil.  These individuals relating patterns are the roller coaster style of love with each display of affection from the lover brings them into ecstasy and the slightest slight brings them into agitation. Think of always wanting to spend time with you, no space, you can't breathe, thinks of what you want before you do and provides it, is hyper vigilant. In my opinion we all may show some form of possessiveness in some form or another in our relationships but this kind is over the top and dangerous for both parties.

4. Individuals with a compassionate style (storge) are usually slow to develop affection and to communicate but will usually experience relationships that endure the test of time. This style of love is without "fever" or "turmoil" and is peaceful, quiet, and kind. The relationship typically starts off as a friendship and develops into affection and love.  This is the kind of relationship that is your best buddy, someone who has always been there for you while engaging in other love relationships that go awry, nursing you through your ups and downs, pains and trials. One day you both look into each other's eyes and wham! Love is there!

5. Individuals with an altruistic style (agape) are often selfless, caring, compassionate and desire to give to another without expectation of reciprocity. This love is patient and is never demanding or jealous. This love is Christ conscious or Buddha conscious love. It gives from the heart center and just loves because love is. These people tend to be able to look past the physical you and see your soul as a divine connection to humanity. Because of this, they tend to love the ALL and not just you.

6. Individuals with a pragmatic style (pragma) seek lovers based on rational, practical sets of criteria such as shared common interest, goals, desires, spirituality or religion that are likely to lead to a mutual satisfactory relationship. They approach love in a "business like" fashion, shopping for the best possible romantic deal by seeking partners with a social, educational, religious or spiritual and interest patterns (yeah I know... I just said that!) When you think of pragmatic.. think common sense seekers. They want it all!

Now what?

After reading the different styles I am sure you can discern that you have experienced at least one or more of them. Either from how you approached a relationship or how you were approached by someone else? If you see one that you have not engaged in that you would like to emerge into ask yourself what was your motivation in you past and what is your NEW motivation for your future. Having  a clear understanding of what it is you NEED and WANT will assist you in pulling in the right energy! Again, don't be hard on yourself. After all we are here on this planet to grow and through growth we have to have experiences, some good, some not so good. But you are HERE and that is what matters so push forward with positive intention!

Keep in mind when meeting someone that you are on the same page or shall I say "love style" when developing a relationship. Talk, talk, talk to the individual to see what they want and where they see the two of you going. If you two are on a different love styles then you may want to regroup and just be friends.

Also keep in mind that different cultures may have a different style that is important to them when establishing long term committed relationships. For example: If you are an African American woman dating a man of Arab decent find out from the very beginning if a romantic possibility can exist. Why? Typically the Arab culture only allow men to marry women of their own culture and religion! Again be clear what you can allow yourself to experience and what you can't handle. It saves broken hearts in the end.

Lastly, in regards to sacred sexuality... YUMMY

Please allow me to briefly explain that when talking about sacred sexual union with another we are speaking more in terms of long term partnerships, marriage, union etc. Over time when individuals seek to experience love on multiple levels they come into a sacred dance that allows them to willingly invest positive energy into the relationship. When this is done the relating patterns take on a whole new meaning and life.  Energy centers known as chakra's align and vibrate in unison and the physical mind even reaches out and thinks for the other, such as the practice of completing each others sentences. When reaching this internal and external state of unity, sacred sexual union is easier to obtain due to familiarity, continuity and attachment. Although this is the ideal, the very practice of sacred sexual union can bring about this unity and a deepened partnership, therefore if you don't have that YET but the both of you are interested in obtaining that state of bliss then by all means find a qualified teacher(s) and jump right into your BLISS and HAPPINESS!

Please comment on the blog to let me know what you think! 
share with your friends!
Namaste
Nisha Moon


Some of the information was taken from "Our sexuality" 11th ed. Robert Crooks & Karla Baur

Dimensions of love and how it relates to sacred sexual union part 1

When thinking about the word love what feelings does it conjure up deep within you? Does it invoke butterflies in your stomach or make you long for romantic evenings, hot date nights, nights engaged in sweaty sexual heat and passion? Or is it finding bliss in solitude just relaxing in one each others company, is it blissful walks along side the beach, gazing into the water, is it hiking in the mountains or making love for days instead of just minutes? Most often we do not even realize that there are different kinds of love and expression. Sadly we pattern ourselves to seek and engage only one or two of them never really getting to the most fulfilling one.

We mindlessly go through each phase not understanding what it is we are experiencing. All too often our desires or intentions do not match our outcomes and we walk away from a potential love interest disillusioned, angry, hurt and frustrated. Unfortunately society has a hand in ushering in all this confusion. We are socialized from an early age as girls to seek the prince in the shining armor. You know the one, he's supposed to ride in on that white horse, with that castle looming in the background and save you from yourself! Remember him? What was his name again? Oh yeah! Prince charming. Well to tell you the truth, I haven't met him and don't think I ever will because he simply doesn't exist. What does exist is my own self understanding and power over how I choose to love others. Having clear intentions on what it is I desire to get mirrored back to me in return is also a gift one can not over look.

You may ask, "how do I go about doing that Nisha?" I am so glad you asked that! Because in this blog segment I am going to briefly outline the different stages of love. You can decide for yourself which one's you tend to operate in and seek the one your heart most desires.

Let's explore the 3 different kinds of  love and then I list the 6 different styles of love we often go through and or use, then I will tie in sacred sexual union's love....

You know someones done a study on love right? Well this is what this portion of the blog will cover. Don't cower I promise it will be brief.
 A renowned psychologist Robert Sternberg proposed that there are 3 dimensions of love: 


1. Passion instills deep desire to be united to another.  Passion is like an addiction. During the early stages of attraction it releases chemicals in the brain that gets us "high". Thus intense stimulation and pleasure can create a powerful craving for the individual we have our sights set upon.


2. Intimacy is the emotional nature of love that creates a bond with an individual we are attracted too. It involves feelings of warmth, sharing and emotional connectedness. This also facilitates a willingness to help the other, openness to private thoughts and tenderness.

3. Commitment is the cognitive aspect of love. This is a conscious choice to love another and to maintain ties and bonds in the relationship over a period of time although challenges may arise within the union.

See that wasn't so hard! What Sternberg suggests is that we often merge the three of these basic human urges to create different subsets of love such as; Fatuous love (passion+commitment) this can be described as "love at first site", it tends to leave quickly. Romantic love (intimacy+passion) this is the stage where love stays a while longer but does not "cement" into a commitment. Compassionate love (intimacy +commitment) this form of love cements into a long term love that grows over time. Understand that all of these different subsets CAN evolve over time, wax and wane or disappear all together.


Meditate for a moment on the different stage of love and contemplate which style you use the most. Don't be afraid to ask yourself those deeper questions on what kind of love you would like to dwell in and see returned. Remember to be gentle with yourself as you are on a discovery that begins within.


When your ready read part 2 discussing  psychologist John Allan Lee's theory on the 6 different love styles!


namaste
Nisha Moon

Sacred Sexual Astrology

Astrology is one of the most ancient divination tools used since ancient times. It is a map of who we are as a soul using the stars and the art of reading symbols which have been infused with spiritual, physical, emotional and psychological insights.  The map that is used can show anyone what they desire, what their skills are, what kinds of relationships we will have, and drum roll and trumpets please........ our sacred sexual energy!  

Is your sacred sexual expression filled with passion, lust, desire, eroticism, greediness, hunger? Does it conjure up fantasies of doing an erotic lap dance in sexy lingerie or do you see yourself dominating with a whip and a pair of handcuffs as a dominatrix?  How does your erotic side express itself? These are important tools that any woman needs to have in her arsenal of knowing herself! When you know this, you will understand how to be the director of your own pleasure either with a partner or solo. The whole integration is to always bring balance to your expression.
                                                                  
Of course let me please explain that it's not always so simple as this. There are many factors to consider when reading anything in a star map or astrology chart, there may be things in your soul's experience and outward expression that can hinder you, hold you back or just plain ol put a damper on your party of sexual fire works. Or there can be connections made in your chart that make your sexual expression overtly taxing, self focused and and well... downright self centered in bed. All of these extras are things that we need to inspire growth as individuals and should never be looked at as something negative.  

Another amazing tool the star map will show you is how you relate in relationships. We realize, well hopefully we do that sexual relations do not occur alone! When we make a choice to have sex with another we are mixing two different energies and that can be both fulfilling and rewarding! Knowing how you relate in affairs of the heart is another piece of your sacred sexuality's expression. A big cosmic lust puzzle that can be deciphered by me.

As an astrological reader I do not promise miracles. You still have to understand your own individual expression and actively seek ways to improve upon it and that means frankly to embrace it. I am just a guide to assist you on that path of deeper self awareness.

To obtain a reading please contact me@
Sacredwaters9@gmail.com
Share with me that you found my information on my blog and would like to inquire about a sacred sexuality reading. 
For all of those who read my blog and commented on the materials (positive comments please!) I will offer a 10% discount on the reading!

Namaste

Here are some testimonials: 

Autumn wrote: "I received a wonderful and deeply insightful reading from (Priestess Nisha) last night. It was interesting (as she actually explained a lot about the signs and their meanings to me) and insightful (she has a real gift for astrology) and I certainly feel that I've learned quite a bit about myself. She's also very good at giving suggestions and counseling in relation to specific questions.
Thank you" (Nisha!) 12/2011


Stephanie wrote: "I have never in my life had a reading such as the one that (Priestess Nisha) provided me! Her insight was invaluable! (Nisha) helped me to understand why I felt the way that I did, to release confusion in my interactions with my husband by not sending mixed messages in the bedroom! (Nisha helped me to stand up for what I wanted by figuring out what my needs are! 
Thank you so much (Nisha) I am telling my friends about you!" 2/11

Amy wrote: "(Nisha) You rock! I so loved my chart reading! The part about how I connect in romantic relationships was so spot on that it made me cry! You have helped me so much in understanding what I was doing that was hurting my relationships. Now I feel confident that I can communicate better in regards to what I need and what I want! Bring on the corsets! 
(Nisha) your awesome!" 11/10


Diane wrote: "(Nisha) not only has your reading allowed me to question my past motivations but it has got my husband curious about his sexual expression! He's didn't believe that astrology worked until I read him your interpretation. Now he's on fire! Thank you so much for your insights, and suggestions. You are truly a Guru that blends astrology, healing modalities and sacred (tantric sexuality) into a common sense dialog". 5/10

 Kellie wrote: "Thank you (Nisha) for giving me permission to let my diva sexual side out! I love to control in the bedroom and thought that something was "wrong" with that. I thought I had to be submissive. Now I know better! I love being me! *just cracked a whip* I have more of the "right" kind of sexual experiences coming my way now! You ROCK!" 1/10

What is sacred sexuality and what does it have to do with me?

Sacred sexuality means many different things to many different kinds of people. It is a timeless art that has been passed down from many different cultures and practices. It is largely feminine directed and entrusted. However, that is not to say that men can not partake in her teachings or pleasures. The Goddess welcomes all. Sacred sexuality for me is the essence of self love, empowerment, spiritual connectedness and sexual heat that brings forth our unique sexual identity. It springs forth a warrior cry in the night right before we begin to do battle! This sacred sexual energy is a woman's right as our bodies are the most precious temple. Every day we are taught through mass media reproduction what we are supposed to be like, feel like, act like, look like and live like. We are taught as little girls how we are  to respond to men sexually, and many of us who seek same sex relations are often confused as to who does what? We are constantly consumed by false truths, someone elses truths and we find it difficult to find our own.

Not to beat a "dead horse" cause we love horses but check these stats taken from ABC in 2004 from a national survey given on how men think about their sex lives in comparison to and women:

  "Women are more conservative about sex in other ways. They're more apt than men to say there's too much sex on TV, 84 percent to 62 percent. They're less likely than men to condone sex before marriage, 54 to 68 percent. And 61 percent of sexually active women, compared with 50 percent of men, call themselves sexually traditional, not adventurous."

Now you may say: "But Nisha that was in 2004, what signifigance does that have at the end of 2011?"  Well I am going to share just that. This poll was taken less than 10 years ago, therefore it still represents the population in general. It has been shown from sex studies that women are far less "clear"about what their sexual needs are and less apt to explore them either verbally or physically with their partner! Check out that last line 61% of women said their sex lives were traditional! Uh hum.. this means NO ADVENTURE! I ask why is that?  During the dawn of 2012 the Goddess is providing women the opportunity to embrace our sacredness and our sexuality IS apart of that awakening, it's our divine seat of creativity within us, and we have an innate power to harness this power with whatever intent we choose to show it to the world or if you would like to keep your stage small, to yourself or to a partner!

It is time in my opinion for women to open up and discuss what they want sexually and to go for it with no apologizes. Now I am not saying lets line up with torches and spears and run down the male dominated establishment. What I am suggesting is we need to begin to TALK ABOUT SEX in ways that facilitate understanding and empowerment.  We need to create sacred spaces that allow women to come together and create sacred sexual circles that allow this kind of dialogue. Did you know that over 60% of women do not know what is happening to their bodies during sexual response and/or arousal?! If we don't know what is happening within, how we teach anyone what to do without?

I encourage all women to take a class on women's sexuality or sexual response! Begin to think about what you need as a sexual woman or if not sexual ask yourself why not if you are able to be? What is holding you back? Explore. Keep a journal. Heck send me an email! 


Until then I have included a link from Planned Parenthood that offers answers to these questions!  I will be offering courses soon on this very topic. Until then take some time to browse and read through the links information!

Namaste!
Nisha~Your Sexology Guru. *please either run your cursor over this message and click the link*
Planned Parenthood is an organzation that empowers lower income women to take responsible action toward their sexual expression through birth control methods, pre-natal check ups, classes on nutrition and STI testing. Please support!